This morning I got dressed for work for the first time in 7 months and I didn’t smell like baby poop and spit up. Today marks the last day of maternity leave and the first day I will be dropping my son off for daycare. I’m extremely lucky/blessed/fortunate to have been provided the opportunity to take 7 uninterrupted and fully paid months off from work to spend with my son, but that doesn’t make today any easier. I’m sad to be away from him, and it’s so hard to trust someone else to watch him, but I suppose this is a part of life. Learning to let go a little bit at a time as they learn to grow their own wings.
I don’t want to sound ungrateful, because I truly am one of the lucky ones to have been given the opportunity to spend so much time at home with my son. But, I would be lying if I said I was excited to go back to work (my corporate job) as maternity leave has come to a close. It’s not that I don’t want to work – because I do! – it’s just that if we’re being completely honest.. I don’t want to go back to this particular job. I realized over the last 7 months how unhappy it makes me. I noticed that as soon as maternity leave started, my daily migraines stopped, and about a month before maternity leave ended, they came back as I increasingly started to think about work more and more.
Maybe it’s not that my corporate job makes me unhappy.. maybe it’s a combination of that and a newfound love of being a mom. But, as much as I love being a mom, I could never be a full-time stay-at-home mom. Props to those that can – you have the hardest job in the world – but I knew before I had a baby that I have too strong of a desire to be a mom AND a career oriented individual to give up working altogether. And although these last 7 months have been more than I could have ever asked for, it’s time to get back to the grind. I know what my dream job is, and we’re working towards it slowly every day. So for now, I will remember what one of my favorite authors says and push on!…
A lot of people have asked me, “but don’t you work from home?” and to that I roll my eyes. YES. I do work from home for my corporate America job. But lets get a few things straight about working from home.. just because someone works from home, does not mean they sit around and twiddle their thumbs all day. HAHA! I actually work! Meaning, I sit down at my desk for 8+ hours a day and WORK! If I were to keep my son home (which btw.. there are policies in place that don’t look fondly on that anyways), I would be doing 2 very wrong things in my opinion.
One – I would be robbing the company I work for. There is NO WAY in helllll I could be fully committed to them while also taking care of my son. That’s not fair (to either of them)! While I’m at work, I’m at work. There’s no two ways about that. I shouldn’t take advantage of that. Period! If your immediate thought was that I can watch him while working from home, you’re likely the reason working from home has a bad reputation. HAHA! Sorry (not sorry) but that’s the truth! I’ve dealt with this misconception for several years now as a work from home employee, and quite frankly, it’s annoying. So I’m setting the record straight! Work from home = hard work.
Two – It would be extremely unfair to Archer! I would be so distracted that he wouldn’t be getting the love and attention I would be wanting to give him or that he so deserves! At daycare, he will be learning (kind of important!), he will be interacting with other babies, and he will come home at the end of the day to a mommy and daddy who can be fully present for him. When Archer is with us, we do our best to not be on our phones (electronics in general). We don’t want him to know us as distracted parents who cared more about FaceBook/Instagram/texting/(insert distraction here), than we did about spending quality time with him. So, if I spent my days with him, with a computer and/or phone in my face for work, I would be doing him, our relationship, and the company I work for, a disservice.
In conclusion… although I’m not excited to be going back to my corporate America job, I am still fully committed to being the best employee I can be, and earning every single dollar I make. If I wasn’t, that would say a lot about my character I think.
As a recap of the last amazingly perfect 7 months of my life as a stay-at-home mommy, I pulled together a few (hahaha… more like a million) of my favorite pictures from each month of Archer’s perfect little life. They’re not all in the perfect light, or with the perfect background, but they’re perfect to me because of the little man in them. It’s truly the most incredible thing to watch your baby grow. To see how far he has come since he was born is beyond amazing, and I can’t wait to see all of the places he will go. Started from the NICU, now we’re here! <— And yes, that’s our own personal remix of Drake’s song. Whatcha got to say about that?! This family can rap.
Archer in the hospital.
Archer’s first month of life.
Archer’s first road trip to Indiana to visit his Grammy and Grampy when he was six weeks old!
Archer’s second month of life.
Archer’s third month of life.
Archer’s first Thanksgiving!
Uncle Kelvin and Aunt Amanda visited!
Uncle Flo visited!
Archer’s fourth month of life.
Archer’s first Christmas!
We hadn’t had professional family photos done since my first nephew was born (he just turned 12), so we figured it was time for an update.. 3 new family members and all (Ryan, Steven & Archer)! Here are just a handful of my favorites with Archer in them!
Archer’s fifth month of life.
Archer’s first time sledding!
Archer got his first camera! *Heart Eyes For Days*
Archer’s sixth month of life.
Archer got his second camera!